kindacatchy | Post IW shenanigans

[ooc: Dude, seriously not a problem. Sorry for dropping out here. I got off work and said, "I'll take a nap," and woke up at midnight, seven hours later.]

I'd tell you to ask him, but he's on strike. [It doesn't baffle Bruce, it terrifies him. He doesn't even know where to begin slotting it in with his Hulk dysfunction, how he remembered Thanos, or... well, pretty much anything in his life just that moment.

He's actually kind of grateful for the weight of Tony's hand as an anchor because just losing his shit does seem like it could be a viable option. Then it's gone and he's just going to have to figure it out for himself, but what else is new?]

A ride's good, but I can only tell you so much about the past two years. Banner no estaba en casa. I don't even know how he got off planet, but he's spent the last two years or so on a planet called Sakaar. It's like the literal dumping ground of the universe.

[He doesn't really want to talk about what Hulk did, but amazingly, they're surrounded by enough worse that it's the least of evils if if keeps them both from dwelling on how they failed and what it cost every single person alive everywhere.]

((ooc: It's okay, naps are everything! ))

You know what, I will. I'll ask him. I have a lot to ask that asshole. [Because, the Hulk is still a part of Banner. If there is something wrong with it, then something is wrong with Bruce. And Tony will do everything in his power to find out what...

He doesn't want to let go either, but if he holds on, they can't move forward. Even if Tony feels that this 'moving forward' is not him anymore, it's some kind of auto-pilot. He's not entirely here anymore, just like Bruce... but maybe he can be still saved.]

On a different planet? To a planet that's- that's a dumpsite? For real? No wonder I couldn't find you for the life of me, you son of a bitch. [He curses under his breath. He tried to find Bruce, he really did. But even Tony Stark can scan the whole of the universe... Tony licks his lips and looks ahead, seeing the battlefield. And just realizing that they are, in fact, in Wakanda. He stops in his tracks, eying the city in the distance. Oh... yes maybe FRIDAY even mentioned something like that. Such a silly detail to look over and yet Tony's limbs go cold.] Oh. I'm afraid my rides may take a, uh, few hours... So uh, were there aliens, like... I don't know, with bug like eyes or skin like stone or somethin'?

Be my guest. Only thing he's said to me is no. [Which... is pretty damned weird as it is.] If he comes out to talk to you, have Thor punch him in the nose for me.

[He shoots Tony a look for being called a son of a bitch. Seriously, save it for Hulk. Bruce probably would have run away, but at least he would have stayed on Earth.]

On Sakaar you mean? I - me, Bruce - I wasn't there for even a whole day, but yeah, there were all kinds of aliens. Buggy ones, humanoid ones with no faces, a few different kinds that looked pretty human.

[The hill that stretches ahead of them is... daunting to consider walking, but he can't justify taking up space in any of the vehicles that have landed to tend to the wounded survivors. There aren't nearly as many of them as there should be, but there aren't nearly as many people, period, as there should be.]

Only after me, Banner. [Yes Tony just threatened to punch the Hulk too, what about that huh. Huh... Tony shakes his head. He'd lost his mind, hadn't he.

He closes his eyes for a moment. He can't even imagine being on a different planet, all alone and-- wait no. He can.

Watching the few that left, Tony feels the guilt again. That sticky, acidic things in his limbs, in his mind, telling him he shouldn't be here either. He also takes a mental note to check in on New York, but he's not ready for those news yet.]

Sounds exciting, we should visit there sometime. Maybe in the summer. When the weather is-- [A beat. Then he sighs again turning to Bruce, patting his chest with the back of his fingers.] Were you alone? Hm? Up there, at the Trash Planet? I mean, besides the vegetable.

[The image makes Bruce think of a chihuahua yapping at a great dane. That's worth a hint of a smile at least.] Might want to repair the 'buster first if you want him to notice.

[They can both hide behind banter a little longer. The world's still spinning, less half its population. Did the universal purge include all life? Or just sentient life? He flinched from thinking of it and wrapped his arms around his own torso in a self-protective, self-comforting hug.]

Vegetable? [He squints at Tony while he tries to pull up a recent cast of new acquaintances to see if any of them fit the description. Nothing seems to stick unless he's talking about that walking tree Bruce caught a glimpse or two of in the middle of hell coming to visit.] I don't know, man. I came to on Sakaar in the wreckange of the quinjet, wearing a Hulk-sized skirt, beads from a giant's Mardi Gras, with two years of my life missing. Thor was there, we stole a ship, went to Asgard, and the next thing I know I'm in New York scared shitless with a bunch of knowledge about Thanos in my head that I didn't learn directly.

And you really need to wear looser pants. I'm telling you, that much pressure on your junk isn't doing anyone any favors. [Non sequiter, what? It follows in Bruce's head, since they're talking Sakaar and clothes. Besides, the tangent keeps them away from Thanos for another minute or two.]

[Touché, Tony wonders. But at least some goal for the future is already set. Even if it's something as simple as repairing the Buster.]

The Hulk. [He helps with a sigh, throwing a hand up in defeat. He knows the rest of the story. So that's how they met with Thor, on that Trash Planet. The more hears about it, the more it sounds like some fever dream. Holy Jesus, Tony thought talking to Bruce will calm him, but--]

My pant- what's wrong with my pants-- I was jogging, it needs to be tight, alright? [Because being right about pants is much more urgent, than anything regarding Thanos. Not today. Except it's today.] Besides it compliments my figure, don't you think?

The Hulk's not exactly company. I've never even known we could talk before today. [For a very limited definition of the word, "talk" at least.] I yell at him, he tells me no. That's what we've got right now.

[He honestly hasn't noticed what Tony's wearing up until now. He twists a little to look him over and shakes his head.] Not those. The only clothes on the quinjet were yours, and I'm telling you, I spent more time picking them out of my crotch than I did planning a daring escape from a 'no one leaves' planet where the main form of entertainment for the population is gladiatorial death matches.

Yeah, but... [Tony scratches the back of his head, wincing a little.] A part of you that you're too familiar with. That's the Hulk. Things like this, they- they become companions of some sort. [The suits. It's a bit like the suits... And if something's wrong them, it needs to be fixed.]

Oh, wow, I offer you to compliment me and you're not even taking it. [Tony sighs softly, looking over Bruce from head to toe, imagining him in those clothes. Is that a smile on his lips? Could be.] I'm glad I could help with distraction then, you should thank me. You are welcome. And you can- you can keep the clothes.

But seriously, Bruce, gladiatorial death matches? I mean, you told me it was a dump and now it sounds way cooler. [It's not cool, he's a bit freaking out there.]

I think you're confusing my green Mr. Hyde with FRIDAY or JARVIS. [Another pang and he can't help but look back in the direction where he'd last seen Vision's body. Vision had kept JARVIS "alive."

At least Tony's pout about the clothes gives him a distraction from missing an AI. He doesn't miss Vision, but JARVIS? Yeah, he'll miss him; Tony does good work with his AIs.]

You can talk to Hulk about your clothes. Maybe he'll have some input on the crotch situation.

[He keeps his head down and resumes trudging. One step at a time, green grass, mud, blood, all passing as he walks through the battlefield. What he wants is to go back to Avengers Tower, but that's no more and half a world away anyway. What he does is all he's ever been able to do - keep moving until he can find a place to hunker down.] It wasn't cool. It was big and weird and everything's been happening so fast.

[He turns his head enough to see Tony out of the corner of his eye.] Ultron feels like it was literally yesterday. Day before at most.

[Tony doesn't know yet that JARVIS-- Vision is gone. Maybe he knows, though, somewhere deep down, but not acknowledging it just yet.]

You already had an input on the crotch situation and I will put it where is belongs. [Pointed look.]

Alright, alright, it wasn't cool. Nothing about it was cool. [He agrees, shaking his arms a bit to warm them up for some reason.

And then Bruce has to mention Ultron. It's not yesterday for Tony, but he is thinking about it every. day. It's another of his mistakes. But he had years to process that experience, to let it eat away at his already butchered soul. While Bruce may just start on that.] I'm sorry, buddy. I wish I could've... somehow reach you and...

[A shaky breath as he looks around again, searching for the words to say. But the world is suddenly so huge and he is so small. How could he ever help anyone.]... work something out. Help you. [Save you.]

[Alright, now he really wants that drink.]

[Denial isn't necessarily always a bad thing. Sometimes it's all that stands between a guy and just... breaking. Says the guy whose own issues came together and gave themselves a name and started living an independent life in the past couple of years.]

Sakaar isn't on you. [He grips the back of his own neck and can feel the ache there, part whiplash from getting tossed around in the Hulkbuster, part tension and fear. He wants to tell Tony that maybe Hulk needed to be on Sakaar for Thor and Asgard, but if he says that, then he has to look at the memories - Hulk's memories - he has of Asgard's destruction and everything after that.]

Talk to me. Tell me something new. What's with this? [He taps the center of his chest and indicates the glowing triangle on Tony's chest.]

Sakaar wouldn't have happened if not for Ultron. And Ultron is on me. [Tony snaps, but immediately tries to collect himself. This is not the time... not the time. But then when is the time?

He looks down at his chest, his breath coming short.]

Oh, this? Protection. For me, for the others. I mean, I don't need it like in the past, it's just an attachment... it was always there, so I figured I'll put it back. Where else could it be? [He clears his throat. Is he rambling? He may be.] It stores the nanobots for the suit. But I can't show you cuz- cuz the suit is gone, it's- it was destroyed when-- back at the... [He needs to sit down, just a few minutes until he catches his breath, until all this passes. Damn, it has been such a long time since a panic attack.] At the evil planet with the... things... there...

Ultron is on us. Both of us. [And that's enough said about that for now. They aren't going to see which of them takes the gold in the Guilt Olympics. It's a talk that needs to be had, but not now, not today. They'd failed bigger than just Ultron today and if they stop to embrace that guilt, if they don't keep moving, the quicksand's going to pull them both under.]

Nanobots, huh? [He can see that Tony's made the mistake of stopping and now he's sinking... It's his turn to put a hand on Tony's back, sit down next to him and offer an anchorage point.] Talk to me about nanobots. When did you get them working? How long until you can manufacture replacements?

[He draws in a deep breath, loudly and deliberately and lets it out slowly - a reminder to Tony to do the same. Breathe, Tony, and be grateful that it isn't Thor with you now or you'd probably be hearing about how the sun is going down.] How's the integration with FRIDAY's AI?

[He really wants a meltdown of his own, but he's already had his back in New York and they're one per customer.]

[No, Vision is, Tony wants to say, but he can't. He is busy putting air in his lungs.]

Not long ago. I started the tech a whole ago, but I needed- I got some intel from- from Wakanda, they helped me with the bots, about the how's and the what's. But the rest was all me- I- I have a few backups, I could come up with another few suits in a few days... [He nods and takes his own breath again, slow and just like the taught him. The hand on his back is a surprise to feel reassuring; usually Tony doesn't like people touching him when he's in a state like this. He's concentrating on a spot near Bruce's feet as he's breathing and talking.]

That took me the longest time, it's- it's trickier with nanobots. The network-- it's more complicated. But I figured it out and you're gonna love it.

[He's calming down, but it's all coming back to him. The war, the losses... how are they going to go on after this?]

Wonder if Wakanda's up for a physicist exchange program. [Keep it inane. Keep it light. Don't look in the dark places. That's advice they can both use.]

The distributed data syncing would be a challenge working across that kind of scale. [He really is interested. Thinking about seeing the specs might be his happy place for a while as they both try to pull themselves together enough to be functional.] Can't afford data lag between your foot and shoulder. There'd better be video of your first prototype runs. I need a laugh.

[Now that Tony's pulling back, finding a little bit of solid ground to stand on, Bruce takes his hand back, tangles his fingers together in front of him while he leans his forearms on his bent knees.]

Nat's blonde now. [Light and inane, there you go.]

All you gotta do is ask, they- they are friendly now. [Tony swallows to wet his dry throat. Yes, keep it together, keep it light.]

I kept some, but only for your entertainment-- if I- if I see them on someone's phone again that's the last time I showed you anything. [Oh it was a beautiful struggle. Pepper called it relapse though.

Tony is still staring at the ground, feeling the weight of that empty shell on his chest.]

Blonde's in this year. [He mutters without giving it more thought. So talk. Such light. He thinks about Steve for a moment. He is also blonde. Or...] They've switched with Steve? Maybe he's red now?

Yeah, I might just do that. [Apparently Wakanda doesn't have a problem with harboring fugitives from the Accords, so there is that. Bruce has already concluded that he and the Accords aren't happening.]

Look, just because I sent Nat video - one time - of you trying to sing Margaritaville at karaoke doesn't mean I'd leak prototype vids.

[Maybe they can do the therapy session the way Tony had unloaded after the Mandarin. Tony can spill his guts and Bruce can doze off about five minutes in. Tony gets to talk it out, Bruce gets some sleep - win/win. He can't just tell Tony to do what Bruce does and repress, repress, repress.

He's about ready to just lie down right here and go to sleep. There are going to be nightmares and there are going to be at least two years' worth of flashbacks, and contemplating those have him straightening and scrubbing his hands over scruffy cheeks. He'll just drink a lot of coffee for now.]

Steve's still blond. He's got a beard now and there's no more red, white, and blue, but he's still blond.

It's a nice place. Warm. Green fields. High-end lab. You'd love it here. [It's better than prison after all. Tony already knows Bruce is so not going to his way with the Accords, and he will not stop and argue about it. Not now, not like this.]

That one time was enough to violate my trust, Banner, don't let me down again. [It's not entirely about the prototype vids, but Tony can't afford another mess up. He has a cool image to maintain.

Tony is also terribly tired. He needs a doctor and... he's not sure what he needs anymore. He turns to look at Bruce as he's talking about Steve. Huh, with a beard. But without the uniform. Tony knows they will meet and he will comment on the beard. But other than that, he doesn't know. But he's not saying anything. He's a master of small talk and now, he has nothing.]

What are we going to do now, Bruce?

I've seen the lab. They've done one hell of a job keeping their secret until now. I'm telling you, Tony, you should have seen their shield in action. It was--

[This is fight talk, and he stops himself before it can go any farther, raising both hands to call a halt and redirect.]

It was.

[He's just not going to address letting Tony down. Not going to talk about the battle. Not going to let the pain of his friends' estrangement in. Instead he stands up with a groan of complaint for the aches that have taken time to settle in, then offers Tony a hand up.]

We're going to go up to that city. We're going to take care of what we can right here and now - food, water, medical care - and then... [He's out of certainty, out of steam, out of everything but a universe's worth of fatigue hanging over his head. He shakes his head, looking tired and lost.] I don't know, but maybe we'll be able to see it more clearly after we get the first part out of the way.

[As Bruce stops himself, Tony lets out a soft laugh. Yes, not going there. They are not ready, neither of them. Not now, or ever... 'It was' indeed.]

You're right. We're the Avengers, we should work for our living.

[He slowly reaches for his earpiece to inform FRIDAY of some updates in regards of their plans. Tony is sure that Wakanda will be alright, but... he will help anyway. At least he can do that. He is sure that there are drinks here too.

Tony sighs then, turning his attention back to Banner. He's sure that he's looking in a kind of mirror. Before he himself realizes it he reaches out for him again, sliding an arm around his shoulders and pulling Bruce close as they are sitting there.]

Does that mean I get two years of back pay?

[The arm around his shoulders startles him enough to stiffen before he slumps, letting a little of his weight lean against Tony. Anyone who isn't physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted just then hasn't been paying attention.]

I wonder if Wakanda has pizza. [There's this pizza joint in New York, not far from the tower... He gets as far as wondering if the owner made it or not and his expression starts to crumple. He could break now, just give up, follow Hulk's lead.

He rejects that idea almost before it finishes forming. He might spend the rest of his life trying to undo what happened here, but he's going to keep trying. He takes a deep breath, puts an arm around Tony's back to steady himself, and gets it all shoved down. He isn't breaking now, and neither is Tony; they don't have that luxury.] The last thing I ate was on Sakaar in a Valkyrie's apartment with Loki chained up in the living room.

[Come on Tony, let that absurdity keep you distracted while they get moving again.]

I'll give you some if you wouldn't reject it. [Tony will always try to support Banner's research after all.

Pizza, Tony's mind repeats, but his body is not on board with that plan. He knows he will have to eat eventually, but the idea right now is repulsive. Everything is repulsive to him. Why do anything, when half the goddamn world is dead and not coming back? He had the gauntlet in his hands, he had a plan and it was working until it didn't...]

If you want I'll send for pizza, straight from New York. I know a place. [His hands fist in Banner's shirt as he's trying to stand up, wobbly and barely holding onto his own sanity.] So now Valkyries are real too? And Loki should really consider being more private with his preferences.

[His tone is without passion, without any indication he cares what comes out of his mouth. Tony seeks the distance, starting to walk before he would stop again, before another attack claims him again.]

[That's worth the smallest of smiles. Two years gone and Tony's still just... Tony.]

What's the point in traveling to exotic new places if you don't see their take on hometown favorites? I want Wakandan pizza. [No he doesn't, but if he finds out that he can't have the New York pizza he wants because the pizza place's staff are dust, that honestly might be the straw that breaks the camel's back.

He hangs onto Tony as they both lever themselves up as though it takes two of them to manage something as hard as standing. Maybe it does, but they get up and they start walking and this is what they've got, including Bruce not mentioning that he thinks Loki's dead and he doesn't know about the fate of the last Valkyrie. It's not that Tony's going to care about Loki, but Thor... He throws out another distraction, anything just to keep them both putting one foot in front of the other.]

I think Hulk has a crush on her.

At this point, I'm afraid their pizzas are way better than in New York. Do you think they have Wakandan shawarma? [Tony wouldn't be surprised about either of those things. In fact nothing can surprise him anymore when it comes to Wakanda.

He walks. They walk, and Tony just can't let go, no matter how it hurts his arm and how awkward it is. He's gonna walk, but he has to feel someone alive in his touch. He has to know that he is awake and this is not a dream, despite its nightmarish qualities.]

The Hulk-- [Excuse him, he has to process that. He frowns, shaking his head for a moment.] Hulk... has a crush. On a Valkyrie. Am I having a stroke?

I think they have Wakandan whatever the hell they want to have. Seriously, this place is a trip.

[Success at least in getting Tony a little more into the here and now. It's a little embarrassing for Bruce, but hey, embarrassment is also a better feeling than the ones that have been weighing them both down.

He ducks his head a little, adjusts how he's hanging on to Tony to try to get a knot out of his shoulder, and snorts silently.] You know how I never could remember what happened with the other guy while he was driving? That's kind of... changed. It started on Sakaar when I met her for the first time and it felt like we'd known each other for years.

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